Washington Commanders vs Dallas Cowboys
The Washington Commanders fly down to the Lone-Star state to take on Dak Prescott and the Dallas Cowboys. Dallas finished the game with double the points that Washington could muster with the final score being 44-22 Dallas. Prescott had a surprisingly decent game throwing for 21/30 while Washington seemed to be able to get things moving on offense, but somehow make nothing happen.
Philadelphia Eagles vs Minnesota Vikings
The Philadelphia Eagles flew west to face Justin Jefferson and the Minnesota Vikings. The game ended 28-22 Philadelphia with Hurts throwing for a very good 19/23 with 13 of those passes going to his two favorite targets, Devonte Smith and AJ Brown, for 304 yards between the two. On the other side of the ball, former Philadelphia Super Bowl champion, Carson Wentz, threw for a less impressive 26/42 targeting Jordan Addison, the most out of his two star receivers.
Denver Broncos vs New York Giants
The New York Giants fly to the Mile High city to take on Sophomore QB Bo Nix and the Denver Broncos. The game ended with the last second field goal making the final score 32-33 Denver. New York’s golden boy Jaxon Dart threw for a less than 50% completion rate. After the loss on top of the semi-below average performance Dart was visibly upset on the sidelines.
Luckily Denver Safety, Talanoa Hufanga, came over to keep Dart’s head up about the loss. Seeing this is a very huge contrast to the events of last week between Kansas City and Detroit. Last week showed what should never be in sports, and this time, this is showing what sports is all about.
No hatred, all love for not your enemy, but simply your opponent.
Los Angeles Chargers vs Indianapolis Colts
The Indianapolis Colts take on the LA Chargers and those absolutely horrendous bright yellow uniforms. Both LA teams have some pretty good uniforms, and I’m just old enough to remember the glorious color rush days. The bright green uniforms of the Seattle Seahawks, the amazing blue uniforms of the Carolina Panthers, even the disgusting brownish uniforms of Jacksonville.
However those bright yellow banana uniforms, that is just bad. I’m all for “Bring back color rush” but I’ll revoke my support if that is modern day “color rush”.
With his receivers being more reflective than a road sign illuminated with LED high beams, LA Quarterback Justin Herbert threw for an impressive 37/55 completion rate with 420 yards on the day. Daniel Jones had his receivers dressed in white, which somehow is less visible then the banana fits, and he managed to complete 23/34 passes for 288 yards.
Somehow, the Banana Fit Ballers managed to get 420 yards and still lose with a final score of 38-24 Indianapolis. LA has some of my favorite uniforms in the NFL. If I could say anything to them it would be to never wear that uniform again in the name of whatever is holy to you.
Los Angeles Rams vs Jacksonville Jaguars
The LA Rams flew down to Florida to beat up the Jacksonville Jaguars. With a final score of 35-7 LA this game looked like varsity starters versus scout team. The sad part is, Los Angeles played a very average game, Jacksonville just sucks.
New York Jets vs Carolina Panthers
The New York Jets, still finding new and improved ways to lose. This time it was perfectly thrown footballs from New York fill-in QB Tyrod Taylor, to the defense of the Carolina Panthers. As a Seattle Mariners fan, I know what it’s like to wait for wins, but man, I feel bad for anyone born into the New York Jets fandom.
To beat New York, all you have to do is not be terrible at football. With a final score of 13-6, Carolina proved this by being bad at football yet still winning. At this rate, I wanna see if they can recreate history and do what the Cleveland Browns did in 2016, which was to go completely winless.
Cleveland Browns vs Miami Dolphins
If you showed an NFL fan from 2021 the final score of this game, they might think it’s edited. 31-6 Cleveland, was the final score. I don’t know whether to be sad that Miami lost, or happy that Cleveland won.
Cleveland relied heavily on Quinshon Judkins for this game, scoring three whole touchdowns. Other than that, both Quarterbacks just sucked at football.
Tennessee Titans vs New England Patriots
The Tennessee Titans hosted the New England Patriots with a final score of 31-13 New England. QB Drake Maye threw for a spectacular 21/23 for 222 yards. I’m just glad he’s able to finally find his footing.
Maye is a very underrated Quarterback and to see him do well is really good. Cam Ward also did not do bad at all for a rookie. People tend to put way too much pressure on rookies but 25/34 completion ratio is not bad at all. Ward definitely did all he could and his team sold him short.
San Francisco 49ers vs Atlanta Falcons
The San Francisco 49ers hosted the Atlanta Falcons. This game ended with a final score of 20-10 San Francisco and with this game, there is not much to write home about. McCaffery had an impressive two touchdown game, rushing for 129 yards on top of that.
Not bad for a team with half their roster on the Injury Reserve list.
Cincinnati Bengals vs Pittsburgh Steelers
“The Unc Bowl,” “the Senior Bowl,” “the Icey-Hot Bowl” finished with a final score of 31-33 Cincinnati. This game featured the two oldest Quarterbacks in the NFL with Joe Flacco at 40 and Aaron Rodgers at 41. In life, that’s not really old but for the NFL, that’s beyond ancient.
To put it in perspective, when Flacco joined the NFL, I was two months old. When Rodgers joined, I was negative three years old. I am now a senior in high school which is shocking on the behalf of both of these quarterbacks.
Joe Flacco threw for a semi-decent 31/47 completion ratio while Rodgers threw for a ratio of 23/34 with 2 interceptions. Not bad for the two veterans.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs Detroit Lions
The Detroit Lions looked like their old selves after the game against Tampa Bay. 24-9 Detroit is a score card that we are more used to seeing with Dan Campbell. Baker Mayfield seemed to just throw the ball down-field and hope that someone was down there with a completion ratio of 28/50. Jered Goff threw the ball a bit more conservatively with a ratio of 20-29.
Los Vegas Raiders vs Kansas City Chiefs
These two division rivals met up in Kansas City while only one team came to play football. 31-0 Kansas City was the final score and I could not tell you what went wrong for Los Vegas. I should say, Kenny Picket did complete 100% of his two passes while Geno Smith completed 10/16 for 67 yards.
Chicago Bears vs New Orleans Saints
Celeb Williams and the Chicago Bears had a pretty average game against the New Orleans Saints. The final score was 26-14 Chicago and I’m not surprised that Chicago won. It’s not very hard to win against New Orleans right now, but they do have one more win over the New York Jets so at least they have felt joy this season.
Green Bay Packers vs Arizona Cardinals
The Green Bay Packers flew down to the middle of the desert to take on Jacoby Brissett and the Arizona Cardinals. Brissett did not do too bad for a backup. 25/36 was his completion ratio and for someone who does not see the field that often, he did pretty decent.
Jordan Love did better, with a final score of 27-23 Green Bay.
Seattle Seahawks vs Houston Texans
The Seattle Seahawks gave Seattle something to smile about after the heart breaking loss with the Seattle Mariners. Luckily, when I watched Julio Rodriguez swing and strike out, I could look at my phone and see the final score of this game: 27-19 Seattle.
I was surprised to see all three quarterbacks do pretty bad. You may be wondering why three quarter backs. You guessed it, for one single play, Cooper Kupp was a registered “passer” recording one interception. Meaning, he has a 0% completion average with one interception, making him statistically the worst ‘quarterback’ in the league right now.
